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I had considered breaking out some familiar similies to review this song, like 'it's like rain on your wedding day' or 'it's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife', but that's not really the most topical gag around, and besides, I think we've had enough jokes at Alanis Morissette's expense by now*. Anyway, it was either those or pretending to be confused about who was performing on the track. 'Isn't it Ironik? Don't you think?'

Paparazzi Lyrics: We are the crowd, we're c-coming out / Got my flash on, it's true, need that picture of you / It's so magical / We'd be so fantastical / Leather and jeans, garage glamorous / Not. New poker experience with live streaming, Invite your buddies and be a worldwide master, Download Now!

Thank you, I'll be here all week, don't forget to tip your waitress, etc.

Lady Gaga, Soundtrack: A Star Is Born. Lady Gaga, born Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta, is an American songwriter, singer, actress, philanthropist, dancer and fashion designer. Gaga was born on March 28, 1986 in Manhattan, New York City, to Cynthia Louise (Bissett), a philanthropist and business executive, and Joseph Anthony Germanotta, Jr., an internet entrepreneur. Her father is of. Chipmunk version of a great pop song Poker Face by Lady GaGa! Lyrics: Mum mum mum mah Mum mum mum mah I wanna hold em' like they do in Texas Plays Fold em' l.

(Here's the video, in which two underage James Bonds gatecrash a Stewie Griffin sexy party.)

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To some extent, my opinion of this song is kind of irrelevant, since it's already earned Elton John's seal of approval for sampling his original track, and if Elton thinks it's good, it's not really my place to sit here and argue, is it?

And yet at the same time, I can't help feeling slightly unenthused. Samples can be a bit of a double-edged sword - if you pick one that's catchy enough, it does most of the heavy lifting for you, but the best songs that use samples are the ones you can imagine working equally well if you lifted the sample right out, and I'm not sure that's the case here.

There are some nice touches in the lyrics, but it's Sir Elton's original which is the only thing that ever really lifts it above ordinary, and without that it would all just feel a bit bog-standard, even with the bassline doing that 'der-DUNDUN' bit from the beginning of 'Baby One More Time'.

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As a result, it feels like a bit of an empty thrill - it's fun while it lasts, but it's hard to remember anything beyond the sample once it's over.

Download: Out now
CD Released: April 27th
www.myspace.com/djironik
BBC Music page
(Steve Perkins)

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* Sorry to interject, but this is an opinion I do not share. I'm just waiting for the perfect moment to strike. - Fraser